Random: Absolute Bullshit

Well, I'm sure everyone on this forum is like aged 30+ but I needed to let out some steam and my friends have become so annoying that I'd rather let out to complete strangers.

My teacher talks shit about me to other teachers in the science department at my high school and it gives me a bad rep. Its annoying to know that about 12 teachers label you as a problem. I'm not a problem but I'm not perfect either, I forget a calculator and i have bad hand writing, I go off on a tangent and doodle...but its High school , right? I'm not in the first grade, but here in europe its like "pay attention, now" and I'm used to doing so when I feel like it ( my grades are fine, the only classes I failed last year is my Art and food Tech).

I don't talk much in class and I don't start problems with teachers but this guy just keeps picking at me. My ap chemisty teacher thinks I have an attitude problem but I don't know really what I do wrong. I know last semester he got at me for lack of effort beacuse I was failing but it doesn't mean i'm a bad person. One time he told me to do a homework assignment and turn it in the next day when the rest of the class got to turn it in the day after i did and I simply told him i wouldn't do it and would turn it in when everyone else did. He brought me outside and told me off and said he was tryin to be nice to me but I wasn't making it easy....hold on, me not making it easy ? my ass. Well anyways after he explodes on me a couple times for dumb crap, I stop talking completely in all his lessons ( I'm already quite but become "invisible" )

Well anyways this semester I'm late 24/7...europe is pissing me off but I'm in junior year so I can't leave and my parents in CA are having recession problems so I can't go back etc and the bad weather is annoying me so in the end I hate waking up...lousy excuse I know but in college my school will never be 1 hour away.

So I have given mean ap chem teacher an excuse to hang me again but most people come late to class regardless so I'm not the only one to be axed right? One day I come in and I'm annoyed that chem teacher has said something..I don't exactly know but something ticks me off and instead of listening I just talk to my friend Sadie. Then the teacher yells at me right when head of science walks in.....I keep calm, smile sweetly and say " but sir I was listening". My magic smile calmed him down.

My ap chem teacher later tells me the head science wants to put me on student behavior report..wtf? Obviously this crap was his idea. The one time I get in trouble for talking in his class and I'm on probation even when my grades are back to normal. Total bs. The head of science harldy knows me, like he could have put me on probation without some support. So I know my tardiness could have brought up the probation issue but its combined with behavior and effort in class. I do my HW well and don't talk much.

So today for the first time I carry my white slip to the lesson and afterwards my teacher writes a comment on it and I have to return it to the head of science. I'm so pissed inside because it reads " quiet but did her work" like being silent in class is a bad thing...? Anyways I'm so pissed I lose the paper ...and the ap chem teacher tells me to tell head of science but I chicken out and go home. I know I'll be in total shit tomorrow but i couldn't face the guy because it would prove his point about me being a crappy student and I was pissed because my other science teacher's behavior towards me had become utterly demeaning.

So anyways, the main reason to why I'm writing this today is because I feel like complete crap. My ap chem is also my tutor/ guidance councelor and next year during college reports he is gonna screw me over because he believes in honesty and won't butter me up because he thinks I'm rude and a bad student overall. And my ego is so big that despite all this I put on the biggest " I'm the carefree american and so cool about it all" because If I let it all get to me , with all the problems I have ....I wouldn't be able to deal. Also, I have a feeling this teacher thinks he's the best thing since christ and wants to "save me" but I won't give him any stupid satisfaction. he can't fix me because I'm not a problem.