Parenting: Having trouble with them getting older

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    I have a 17 year old and I am having a real hard time believing she will be 18 and almost a adult, she got her preregister voter card. How do I handle her being able to handle her life?
    • CommentAuthorDonm716
    • said   CommentTimeMay 6th, 2007
     
    Greenflagcollect,
    It's not an easy thing to handle letting go of your sons or daughters to the real world. Just have faith in the way that you raised them and hope it all stuck with them. I have a younger brother who just turned 18 and I still can't believe it. Although, he thinks he's invincible he does have a good head on his shoulders. I'm not sure if this helps you, but keep your head up and always be there for them when they need you.
  3.  
    Donm716 Thank you for that. And I hope she does have her head on her shoulders. But you never know when they get out and go to school what will happen in the fast lane. All i can do is pray she will stay the straight and narrow.
    • CommentAuthorDino
    • said   CommentTimeMay 7th, 2007
     
    I'm not a parent but I was a teenager once (maybe :) ) and I don't think hoping that everything is going to be ok with you daughter growing into adulthood and handle her life on her own is enough, do you think she can make a right decisions on her own yet?
    The reduction of your daughter's dependence on you and getting in the fast lane is natural, you shouldn't feel frustrated and retreat from her life. Call me an old school but I think you should participate in her life and steer her in the right direction whenever it's possible without being too authoritarian.
  5.  
    sjeeps
    Thank you for that i will keep that in mind. And I do hope she will make the right decisions, I do believe she will.
    • CommentAuthorlava
    • said   CommentTimeMay 11th, 2007
     
    Greenflag, your daughter at this point is already molded. If you like who she is now, I'm sure you're going to feel the satisfaction of a job well done by way of raising her.
  7.  
    I kind of know what you're going through greenflagcollect. My son is 18 and about to graduate and I still think he's a baby. I can't even begin to imagine him leaving my home to go out on his own. I worry about evrything...how's he gonna eat, will he brush his teeth (lol...seriously), will he treat people, women especially w/respect, will he always come home if he needs me, if he's sad, lonely, hungry :) He's still my baby and I think I've taught him the best I possibly could to be a respectful, decent, responsible man. But I am scared for him. What I do know is there really isn't much more I can say to change the man he has become, he's heard it all from me, I've told him and scolded him and lectured him as much as I possibly could for the last 18 yrs :) I just hope it sunk in! They say we have to let them loose in the world and pray we've done our job well...as much as I think that sounds like bs...what else can we do? I can't imagine how it is w/a daughter because that is totally different. Just wanted to let you know I'm feeling ya! :)
    • CommentAuthorkitty123202
    • said   CommentTimeMay 23rd, 2007
     
    Just let her goooooooo and hope you raised her right. Trust her to make good decisions and to always do right by herself. Always be there if she needs you, but back off when she doesn't. i don't know if that is at all helpfull, just speaking from experience with my own mom.
    • CommentAuthordeemara
    • said   CommentTimeMay 30th, 2007
     
    Green, my heart goes out to you. I'm not sure what is best for you and your child but I know that concern. I had hoped it would get easier as they got older. I'm sure in some ways it does but that concern is there whether they are 1 or 18. It's the second time in their lives when they are about to take their first steps. And just like when they are babies, we don't want them to fall and get hurt but we have to give them the space to explore. The paradox of motherhood. ((Hugs)) to you! I know it's not going to be easy regardless of what we've written.
    • CommentAuthorLiz Mann
    • said   CommentTimeMay 31st, 2007
     
    Look at the bright side. Finally you can take some time for yourself and start focusing on all of the things you had to set aside in order to properly rear your daughter. You have spent the past 18 years teaching her the boundaries of life, I am sure she will succeed. Besides Sweet Brittany never does anything wrong and you know it. She is a great kid, who is probably more adult than us. LOL>

    But seriously I do understand. My eldest son Josh graduated this year and I haven't stopped crying, of course thats because he claims he is never leaving home. I even bought him luggage for graduation. LOL

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